Friday, March 20, 2009

Cheetos

I have purchased Cheetos approximately two times in my life. Once was during my exclusive college diet of ice cream and sugary cereal, when I branched out a bit. The other was on Monday. I got some Cheetos and some Cherry Limeade. I was a happy girl. This morning as I munched on them, Dave began clearing his throat nervously.

"Uh, uh...," he stammered. "Um..."

"What?" I finally asked, as he was interrupting my blog-reading.

"I don't think Cheetos are good for the baby," he said, looking around for an escape route, should I have decided to kill him. Which I still might.

"You don't think Cheetos... are good for the baby?" I repeated slowly, not sure if this was leading up to a funny joke.

"Um... no?" he said, surreptitiously shielding his face, should I have decided to bop him in the nose. Which I still might.

"Are you telling me to stop eating these Cheetos?" I asked, thinking surely I had misunderstood.

"Um... yes?" he said, inching for the door, should I have decided to pummel him. Which I still might.

This from the man who has 8 servings of dinner if he feels like it, downs half of every batch of cookies before they even hit the oven, guzzles Diet Cokes like water was never invented, and tries to insist on fast food for every meal we eat out.

"I was just thinking the baby needs healthier foods," he offered, while I stared at him with steely eyes.

"Yes," I agreed stonily. My Brewer's Diet chart (the most highly recommended pregnancy diet I can find) was minimized on the computer screen in front of me. The receipt lay on the desk from my order of the healthiest whole grain oats I'd had shipped from out of state just that morning. My vegetable and tofu leftovers sat in a box in the fridge, procured last night after much pleading against Dave's choice of pizza.

"Yes, please," I continued. "Save me from myself."

Dave ran off with the offending bag. I think I heard some munching.


7 comments:

Jessica said...

That's a sneaky cheeto thief trick!
Shenanigans!

You can get cheese puffs that are way better for you and taste cheetoish, without the day glo powder, at Trader Joes.

Cooper Family said...

Eat whatever you want. I think I lived on Mac n' Cheese, Ice Cream and Hot Cocoa when I was prego with Everson. He turned out pretty normal, so no worries about eating the occasional cheetos!

M-A said...

I started my first pregnancy out eating SO healthy. No refined sugar, no junk, etc. Then I got morning sickness and almost died. One of the only things I could keep down was twix. So I ate one everyday. You know, to stay alive. After I felt better I ate really healthy but ate a banana split every night. I told myself I deserved it because I was so uncomfortable. I didn't think it was a big deal until I birthed a 9 lb baby that ripped my body to shreds. Second pregnancy I stayed away from sugar and had a 6 lb 14 ouncer. My point is, eating healthy is a good idea. If it's any consolation:)

Blythe said...

He just wanted your cheetos! As if a few measly cheetos is going to hurt your little girl. Puh-lease!

Staci said...

Best post ever. That's all I can say!!!

Robyn said...

You have my permission to tell Dave to "stick it" !!!! Oder, veileicht sag mal, "Halt Gaul" du schwein.

Karina said...

I LOVED cheetoes with certain pregnancies. And I never like them normally. I think you need to eat the best you can and then not worry about it. Mariah was made out of top ramen as that was all I could keep down the first few months.