Sunday, June 14, 2009

32 Weeks

Today we made a welcome-home video for Dave's parents. Though I whined, whimpered, and fussed, Dave insisted I actually be on-screen with him, as opposed to appearing only in voice-over form, due to how FAT I looked. I don't know folks, when I look in the mirror or at pictures, I see something MUCH better than in this horrible video. There was no way around it. We shot it four times, in four different locations, hoping perhaps one of them would lend a slimmer light to my sad self. Nope. Not the case. Hoping for the best, I asked Dave if that's what I really look like in real life. Dave and I are pretty honest with each other. With regret, he told me it was so. I nearly shot myself.

In other news, we have another ultrasound this week, enjoyed our first Hypnobirthing class, have the baby's room and kitchen painted, and yesterday I cleaned the carpets. We're getting ready for the big move! Unfortunately we have some unwelcome house guests already squatting on our property though. Yesterday we saw a spider almost the size of a squirrel in the living room. It peeked out a crack in the baseboard and Dave (at my insistence) tried very meekly to squish it with a paper towel. It easily got away behind the baseboard again.

"Did you get it?!" I shouted.

"No," Dave said. Now refusing to attempt with a paper towel again, he got a wooden paint stirring stick to squash it with. He wiggled the baseboards and it popped out again. He tapped his stick mildly on the wall where it stood. It walked leisurely back between the baseboards.

"Did you get it?!" I shouted.

"No," Dave said. I had no idea what was going on. It was like he wasn't even trying! Finally it dawned on me.

"Are you afraid of the spider too?" I asked incredulously.

"Yes!" Dave shouted. "Did you see the size of that thing?!"

Now called out on his fear, Dave had to make good as man of the house. He lured the spider out again. This time he attacked the wall with his stick wildly, mightily smashing and whacking off hunks of paint, until his stick broke in half.

"Did you get it?!" I shouted.

"No," Dave said. At this point I was laughing so hard I was ready to give up on the idea that we would ever conquer the Houdini of rodent-sized arachnids. Luckily, two walls-worth of baseboards removed and a crunchy splurt on the fourth attempt later, Dave prevailed. Now that is a good husband for you.


Cooper Family said...

I love those pictures! I just want to rup your belly! You are a beautiful pregnant woman! I don't care what you think or what anyone else thinks.
As for the spider, I would have peed my pants in fear. Todd is my spider killer and I am very grateful for that.

Valerie and Mercado Family said...

Jason is afraid of big spiders too. I discovered that in DE, where they were monstrous! He's getting better though!

Emily said...

you look so super cute and i don't think big/huge/large at all... i'm not lying either, i would tell you the truth! you just look pregnant... and round... like the little boy said, it looks like a ball... :)

Jessica said...

You are all baby! Don't even trip!

Courtney said...

Yeah, I used to make Jamie kill any spiders that dared enter into our apartment. She was really good at it, too, though I think she had spider carcass on half the shoes in her closet.

I miss that girl.

D. said...

Hey Jessica...
Such cute pix! You really are all baby. After she arrives, you'll be back to your reg. size before long I bet.
As for spiders, I like to mush them myself...Is that wrong?!?

Staci said...

Your belly is definitely bigger than when I saw you last! You DO look beautiful.

That spider story is pretty horrifying!

Julie and Todd said...

I am laughing out loud at the spider visual. Next time, call me. I have pointers from killing the beasts in the Philippines. I refuse to do it myself, but will happily coach anyone as to how they might do so themselves.

Emily said...

You don't look fat at all! You just look pregnant. And there is a difference.

So... if I were you, before you move in I would just bug bomb the whole place. That helps keep spiders out for a while. And after you bug bomb, I'd go around and spray Home Defense spray around every door and window (well, make Dave do it, the stuff is basically poison so I wouldn't be the one spraying it if I was pregnant). It says it works for 6 months, and I don't know how well it works for the full 6 months, but it definitely works well for at least 3 months, I find dead spiders around my entryway all the time, and better dead than alive!

Spiders terrify me, and some people may think that's all a bit overzealous, but I have a big scar on my back from a spider bite, and there are poisonous spiders around, so I'd rather feel more confident that my home is spider free (or as spider free as it can possibly be).