Friday, January 9, 2009

I Might Leave Dave and Marry the Inventor of Zofran

Not really. But I love him, whoever he is. I would like to give him ten bazillion dollars. I would like it if he enjoyed the rest of his days in ease on a remote isle. I would peel his grapes and give him back scratches whenever he asked. I would pay a thousand dollars for each of his pills.

(Cue choirs descending from heaven): HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH!

I took one at 10:15 am yesterday and they are only supposed to last 6-8 hours. It is nearly 24 hours later. AND I FEEL GREAT!!!!!! It's like it changed my brain chemistry or something.

The pharmacist looked at my bill and said, "Okay, 30 pills, that's $501.00."

"What about my insurance?" I asked, rummaging for my wallet. (I wasn't about to argue it- give me those pills if I have to mortgage the house.)

"Oh," she said. "Ten bucks."

A new pharmacist came to give me the precious bottle of pills and cautioned, "Only use this if you really need it."

"I really need it," I assured her.

"Well, don't take it just because," she said. "Wait until you need to take it."

"I need to take it right this second," I insisted, pointing to my bottle of water at the ready, also purchased at the pharmacy, for purposes of chugging said pills instantaneously upon receipt.

She handed me my bag, leaned down, and almost whispered, "This is a miracle drug."

How right she was.


Robyn said...

Yeah!!!! Congrats. Are you taking guess on what the sex will be? Will you find out? For the record, I say girl. I think I said boy before, but I say girl now.

Jessica said...

We will definitely find out. I really want a girl and Dave really wants a boy. But when I heard the the heartbeat I felt like it was a boy. I dunno.

Blythe said...

Yay! So glad to hear that your morning sickness has taken a beating from your amazing new drug!

Emily said...

yay for you!!

Kearns/ Banner Families said...

I am soooo glad you got some! Now for your next pregnancies, you will march yourself into the Dr.'s office as soon as you conceive to get through it. Yeah for you!

Emily said...

Hi Jessica, I'm glad you're feeling better! So if it's not supposed to be bad at all, how come they were so adamant about waiting to take it until you really needed it? Just wondering. Seems kind of mean of them. And $500? Wow that's a scare. Isn't that crazy? Drugs are too expensive. Can you imagine if you were having a baby and you had no health insurance? Yeah there are state programs, but... wow. How stressful, it's sad.

Jen said...

Ha HAAAAAA That is SO funny!!!!! I have missed you friend. I have thought about you a lot and have been afraid to come over. What if my perfume set off a chain reaction starting with you gagging then holding your mouth RUNNING for the bathroom to vomit??? The very idea has kept me away so that you won't subconsciously resent my visits. I still have your Christmas present for crying out loud AND the PX90 which I have NOT kept up with so it might as well go back....whaaaaaah. I am SO glad to hear you are doing better!!!!!

Todd Hillyard said...

Hallelujah! If you can't be with us, take Zofran.

Julie and Todd said...

I am soooooooooooooo happy! That is the most marvelous news I have ever heard. I am doing a very enthusiastic dance of joy right now.